After the Conviction

 More than one friend, nonresidents of Minnesota, emailed me the day after the conviction of Derek Chauvin to say how relieved I must feel. 

I did feel relief, but I wondered if I should feel relief. Why did I feel relief and what exactly did that relief encompass? And what business did I have feeling relief? I am a white, privileged woman in her 70's and what stake did I have in the outcome of the trial? 

Besides, this was only one trial, one police officer convicted, and shootings have continued, even as the trial was in process. 

I was relieved that riots and violence and property damage were averted.

I was relieved that Minnesota might not be in the news every night.

I was relieved that in at least one case justice was done.

I was relieved for George Floyd's family--that at least their loved one was known as a real person whose life should not have been taken from them. 

In Sunday's sermon Pastor Javen Swanson gave a brilliant sermon about the heaviness he was feeling, and reminded us that "justice occurs when hearts are changed."

Justice occurs when hearts are changed. 

That's the kind of relief I want--the relief that comes knowing hearts have changed. That has yet to be proven. 

I have been reading Diana Butler Bass's new book, Freeing Jesus, Rediscovering Jesus as Friend, Teacher, Savior, Lord, Way and Presence, and she mentions Dorothy Day who "displayed a restless sense of moving deeper into both the world and God." (186)

Read that phrase again: "...a restless sense of moving deeper into both the world and God." That's what happens, I think, when hearts are changed. 

Bass continues to describe the two spiritual journeys: "the interior one toward knowing our true self and knowing God, and the one directed outward into the world to enact God's justice and love." (186) 

As a spiritual director, I meet with clients who desire to deepen that interior journey, to awaken to the movement of God in their lives. What often happens then is that their growing awareness leads them into the world to BE the movement of God. Or sometimes a client comes to me whose focus and energy is devoted to making a difference in the world, but they feel some emptiness or exhaustion in their spiritual life. 

The interior journey and the one directed outward have a dynamic relationship. Both are needed. Sometimes one is--and needs to be--more dominant than the other. For each of us one journey may feel more challenging, and the other may unfold more naturally. My way of pursuing each of the journeys may look, more than likely will look, different from your paths. 

Both paths, entangled sometimes, but always stretching out in front of us, change hearts. 

This is hard work. Important work. Sacred work. This is the work God has given us to do. 

Here are some words that may help. 

        Go gently into the new day.
        Go with love for yourself and others.
        Kindle patience towards all beings, all things.
        Remain awake as you step in any direction.
        Keep a hand on the pulse of your creativity.
        Remember always what is yours to embody.
        Share yourself freely.
        Go with your imagination lit and your intuition purring with possibility.
        When in doubt, be yourself.
        Step forward. 
                                    Glenn Mitchell, Oasis Ministries

An Invitation
Where are you on the journey to change hearts? I would love to know. 

NOTE: You can watch Pastor Javen's sermon here. You can read Diana Butler Bass's blog here. You can read Glenn Mitchell's daily meditations here.