Tuesday, November 26, 2019

A Gratitude List: Tuesday's Reflection

Yes, it is that time of year--the time to intentionally give thanks for my many blessings.  I try to be aware of my blessings on a daily basis, but how easy it is to take my good health and Bruce's good health for granted, along with the love of family and friends. My life is full of riches, and I am so grateful.






I am grateful for so many things--big and small. 
      * The ongoing opportunity to meet with my spiritual
         direction clients.
      * The sun pouring in through the snug's windows.
      * A bit of chocolate hidden in my desk drawer.
      * The next book waiting to be read.
      * Sunday Mornings--worship and education, greeting friends
         and welcoming those new to this time and space
      * "Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me," the comedy news show on NPR. 
      *  A small neighborhood grocery store for the times I forgot to  
         get something on my list.
      *  A fresh hanky for my pocket or purse.
      *  Leftovers
      *  The new season of "The Crown" on Netflix
      *  My grandchildren who always seem happy to see me and 
          willing to share themselves. 
      *  The library's HOLD list. 
      *  A chatty email from a friend.
      *  A goodnight's rest.
      *  An idea for my next blog post.
      *  Space on the calendar.
      *  The twinkle lights around my garret window.
      *  Morning devotions. Time to pray. Time to write in my 
          journal. Time to watch the day begin.
      *  A new podcast on one of favorites, such as "What Should I 
         Read Next?"  
      *  A date for lunch with my sister or a dear friend. 
      * Our son and daughter-in-love's elderly dog does not have 
         cancer.
      *  An unexpected conversation in the grocery store with a  
         friend from church.
      *  The drive along Minnehaha Creek.
      *  My insightful spiritual director.  
      *  Walks in our neighborhood. Now I notice the changes from
          pumpkins to Christmas greens and lights. 
      *  The sound of children playing outside after school.
      *  My husband extending his hand or arm as we cross the street.  
      *  The gift of living close to family. We are here for them, and
          and they are here for us. 
      *  Preparations for the coming holidays. Yes, they are full -- but
          the fullness is more joy-filled than stress-filled. 

I know as soon as I publish this post, other blessings will fill my heart. I count you, dear readers, by the way, among my many blessings. 

Sooo... imagine me saying very loudly with great expression.

               I AM SO GRATEFUL!!!!

              Love wholeheartedly, be surprised, give
              thanks and praise--then you will discover
              the fullness of life. 
                                 Br. David Stendl-Rast

An Invitation
What's on your gratitude list? I would love to know. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving. 



Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Being in Dialogue: Tuesday's Reflection

I went to the Westminster Town Hall Forum to hear one of my heroes speak: Parker Palmer, whose books are lanterns along the way of my spiritual life.

I had no idea I would discover another star in the sky. 

Instead of one "old white man" speaking--and Palmer would say that about himself--I was introduced to an amazing Black woman in her 50's who has lots to share. Sondra Samuels, the president and CEO of the Northside Achievement Zone (NAZ), an organization focused on ending intergenerational poverty through education and family stability. 

I have no doubt I would have learned a great deal if Samuels had been the solo person on the platform, but oh, how much richer the hour was because of the dialogue between the two of them. 

Dialogue is richer than simple conversation and different from advice giving, for dialogue involves shared inquiry, which can increase the awareness and understanding of all parties. The purpose of dialogue is to share and understand how we each experience the world. When we enter into dialogue our hearts are touched and we are open to being changed. 

That's what Samuels and Palmer offered as they
        * listened to each other respectfully and with the ears of the heart, checking each other's responses, asking for clarification and amplification, 
       * dared to be vulnerable with each other, 
       * reminded us it is ok to let someone else have time to talk, and it is important to give time and space to talk about and listen to difficult and painful topics,
       * expressed curiosity, which can lead to deep listening. When we listen deeply we are truly present to the other person in their experience, in their sorrow and/or joy, and in their desire for connection. 

Most importantly, both Palmer and Samuels proclaimed the need to speak the truth and speak the truth in love. Not in "Minnesota Nice," and certainly not in rage. But in the listening and speaking  healing can occur. 

Granted, Samuels and Palmer seemed to be on the same page when it comes to politics and what is happening in this country, but their experiences over the years have been vastly different. Samuels carries her "blackness" in her body and Palmer will never know fully know what that means, but they leaned into each other, daring to speak and to hear one another.

Samuels quoted a poem by Hafiz, which Palmer included in his book Healing the Heart of Democracy, The Courage to Create a Politics Worthy of the Human Spirit, p. 47.
  
                                         Out
                                  of a great need
                           We are all holding hands
                                   And climbing
                           Not loving is a letting go.
                                        Listen,
                            The terrain around here
                                           Is
                                        Far too
                                     Dangerous
                                           For
                                          That.

An Invitation
Make a commitment to hold hands and climb together. Who is waiting to be in dialogue with you? I would love to know. 

My Favorite Parker Palmer books:
Healing the Heart of Democracy, The Courage to Create a Politics Worthy of the Human Spirit
Let Your heart Speak, Listening for the Voice of Vocation
A Hidden Wholeness, The Journey Toward an Undivided Life

You can listen to the podcast or online at https://www.westminsterforum.org/archive/

Tuesday, November 12, 2019

Preparing for Winter: Tuesday's Reflection

NOTE: Beginning this week, I will only post on Tuesdays till after the New Year. 

This morning a neighbor walked by when I was sweeping off the light dusting of snow on our sidewalks, and we had a brief conversation.
    "I've decided to be optimistic and hope the snow will melt today," he laughed.
    "Let me know how that works for you," I responded.
    "Do you and Bruce get away during the winter?"
    "Not usually. We like winter. It doesn't generally bother us. How about you?" 
     Really? Well, I've got plans to be gone in January and March and maybe December, too," he chuckled and dashed down the block towards his house, tugging on the leash of his dog. 

Thus, begins the ongoing discussion about winter distress here in Minnesota. True, winter has arrived a bit earlier and a bit more definitely than normal this year. The temperature here is 6 this morning, but the sun is shining brightly and no more snow is predicted till later in the week.

I realize I have a life of privilege. I live in a cozy house with a good furnace. I have a supply of sweaters and shawls and wool socks and long underwear, when I need it. Plus, as a woman in her 70's, I can stay home when I want to and don't need to battle the ice and snow on the roads.  

Perhaps it is my Danish heritage, but I not only don't dread winter, I welcome it. Last year I learned about the Danish concept of hygge (hue ga), which is hard to define, but has to do with finding joy in the simple pleasures of everyday life. 
            
           Hygge illuminates the long, dark Scandinavian
           winters with candlelight and crackling hearths
           and good times shared with friends and family.

           Hygge is about instilling a feeling of contentment
           and happiness...Decorate your home with items that
           bring you joy, such as fresh flowers and pine cones
           collected on country walks. 

           Hygge is about sharing good times with the people
           you love, and one of the best ways of doing this is to 
           sit down together for a meal or tea and cake, and discuss
           the big (and little) things in life.

           Hygge isn't just about shutting out the cold and 
           snuggling by the fire.

           Hygge is about seeing beauty in the everyday and
           savoring each moment either in the form of well-
           deserved "me time" or spending time with loved ones.

                           from The Art of Hygge, How to Bring
                           Danish Cosiness into Your Life
                           Jonny Jackson and Elias Larson

The winter months feel spacious to me. I look at the bare trees and see open space; space in which I can spend more hours at my desk writing or in the snug under a blanket reading. I sleep longer, too, and we are learning how important good sleep is for our well-being. I love the hearty food of winter, the layers of comfy clothes, the song of the wind outside the door, and even the early arrival of darkness each day. 

That's how I feel, but I know that is not the case for everyone. However, I invite you to prepare for this coming season. What can you do to improve these winter days for yourself?

Gather some favorite recipes for soups. Become a baker--breads and scones and muffins. Buy a new boardgame or get out
ones you haven't played in years. Stack favorite books you have thought about re-reading. Set a pretty table--be sure to include candles--even when you are eating by yourself. Get out a craft project you set aside--a sweater you haven't finished knitting. 

Remember those boxes of photographs you keep telling yourself you want to organize. Now is the time. Rearrange your furniture. Move a favorite chair to the spot in the house that gets the best light--no matter what room it is. Cut paper snowflakes--they will remind you of the magic and wonder of childhood. 

Write letters. Not emails. Letters. Luxuriate in soothing body lotions. Watch feel-good movies. Get outside, even if it means only standing on your front steps and breathing. When it isn't icy, bundle up and go for a walk. Notice the beauties of the day. 

Check on a neighbor who may need help shoveling or getting to the grocery store or who may find winter to be even more distressing than you do. I bet she would love some of the muffins you made. And what can you do for others who don't have the privileged life you do? Are you really using all the coats and scarves taking up space in your closet? Contact a local agency who would love to have them. 

Rather than wait till you are snowed in or feeling the heaviness of one dark day after another, prepare now. Get ready. Make a list of appealing activities and gather what you may need. 

Our weariness with winter doesn't make the season go any faster, so why not decide to live into these months? Why not honor these days of your life?

                   Fear less, hope more; 
                   eat less, chew more;
                   whine less, breathe more;
                   talk less, say more;
                   hate less, love more; and 
                   all good things are yours.
                              Scandinavian proverb

An Invitation
What are your winter intentions? I would love to know.