Showing posts with label decluttering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label decluttering. Show all posts

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Thursday Reflection: Happy New Year!

Dear Friends, Happy New Year and welcome to 2015!  

New Year's Day is not the only time during the year when we experience a fresh start, a new beginning. Perhaps you have that feeling at the start of the school year, even though you haven't been in a classroom for many years, or maybe it occurs on the first day of  turning earth for a new garden or opening a can of paint to bring new life to an outdated room. Have you have known that feeling of "newness" with the birth of a grandchild or a decision to make a major change in your life? Yes, one can experience a feeling of beginning anew often throughout the year, but somehow January 1 is unlike all other launches. 

In January we seem to be bombarded with suggestions about how to organize and declutter our lives. Target's aisles of plastic bins are marauded by those who have resolved to bring more order into their lives. Magazines and newspapers and blogs and other websites all give hints for how to deal with the material stuff in our life, all in the hope of living easier. 

Many of us create lists in these first days of the new year of what needs to be done in our homes. In our home, today is the designated "demolition" day. No walls are coming down. Just the Christmas decorations. As much as I have loved decorating this year, and the house has been so cozy in the glow of candles and Christmas lights, IT IS TIME! I can't wait to return Christmas bins to the storage area, and then my first 2015 house task will be to tackle the laundry room. Mundane, I know, but so be it. 

My list is long as we continue to deal with all the possessions from a lifetime of collecting. Not only do we live in a much smaller home now, but we are oh, so ready to shed, declutter, and lighten up, giving us both the appearance of a new beginning, as well as the space and the emotional energy to live anew. To be open to the new, instead of attached to whatever has cluttered, not only our homes, but our hearts and our minds.

That, of course, is the real purpose of decluttering--to let go of what no longer serves us well, of what impedes us from being the person we were created to be. Dealing with all the physical stuff in our lives is important, but it is not enough. 

What is cluttering and burdening our hearts and minds?

I am reminded of what one of my favorite spiritual guides, Mark Nepo, says on the subject of decluttering and letting go in his book, The Book of Awakening. He tells the story of a friend preparing to paint his family room. He mixed the paint outside and then loaded himself with everything he needed to begin painting. You can guess what happened. He struggled to get the door open and in the process spilled the gallon of red paint. 
          It's such a simple thing, but in a moment of ego we
          refuse to put down what we carry in order to open the
          door. Time and time again, we are offered the chance
          to truly learn this: We cannot hold on to things and 
          enter. We must put down what we carry, open the
          door, and then take up only what we need to bring
          inside. p. 3

The spiritual writer Joyce Rupp refers to this time of year as a time of "freshness," a time when we are encouraged to let go of old hurts and fears; feelings of failure and weakness or of the old stories dwelt on for far too long. She quotes the poet Gerald Manley Hopkins, "There lies the dearest freshness deep down things." and then Rupp goes on to say,
          Freshness. That's it. That is what this new year is 
          offering me as I pray to God of my life this sparkling
          morning. God is holding out a freshness of life to me.
          God is offering me a new beginning with this new 
          year.
                                Fresh Bread And Other Gifts of Spiritual
                                Nourishment, p. 19

As we declutter our homes and attempt to live simpler, easier lives, what I think we are moving towards is that feeling of freshness, like putting fresh sheets on the bed or eating fresh grapefruit in the morning or looking out into the fresh morning sunshine even on a below zero day. We yearn to see life with a fresh perspective and to live with fresh pep in our steps. We want to freshen up! 

Freshness comes when we forgive ourselves and others, when we move through and beyond the ways we restrict ourselves, when we recognize what is stale in our inner lives and needs to be tossed. Along with freshness comes deeper and wider compassion or as Nepo says, "our heart becomes our skin." (The Endless Practice, Becoming Who You Were Born to Be, p. 119)

Call it decluttering or downsizing or call it creating freshness. Whatever you call it, make 2015 a year when you open the door and cross the threshold holding only what you need. 

An Invitation
What areas of your inner life need decluttering and where does your life need freshening? What are your plans for bringing freshness into your life? I would love to know. 
          





Thursday, January 16, 2014

January's Book: The Not So Big LIfe, Making Room for What Really Matters by Sarah Susanke

Many people I know are in the process of sorting through and letting go of mountains of possessions--either their own or their parents' or other relatives. That is the reality of this time of life, and the process (Note the word "process.") can be daunting and laden with regret. 

Why haven't I done this before? Why did I gather all of this in the first place? There is a tendency to scold ourselves or the parent who has closets packed full--scary full! Or there can be the tendency to ignore--to be aware of all that is hidden away or even in plain view, but not wanting to tackle it. 

Decluttering, Shedding Our Stuff 
What we have accumulated, mindlessly or not, has been gathered over the years, decades for most of us, and there is no reason to believe that simplifying our stuff will happen over night. Not unless a dump truck pulls up in front of your house and you indiscriminately dislodge your hold on everything you own. 

Although there are lots of books to help you figure out how to sort and disperse and prioritize and let go, such as Organize for a Fresh Start, Embrace Your Next Chapter in Life by Susan Fay West http://organizeforafreshstart.com and SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life, A Four-Sep Guide to Getting Unstuck by Julie Morgenstern http://www.juliemorgenstern.com/Products_Books_WOIE.php, no book will do it for you. At some point you have to open the closet door and make decisions and DO IT. 

Moving into a much smaller house makes this process a necessity, and frankly, I welcome it, even though it takes time and energy and focus to cut through all the layers of accumulation. 

Creating a Not So Big Life

What I realize is that with the sorting comes evaluation and reflection. And that's where The Not So Big Life, Making Room for What Really Matters by Sarah Susanka http://www.notsobighouse.com can be a touchstone and guidebook. Susanka, an architect and visionary of the "not so big" philosophy in homes, encourages us to "identify what stands in the way of living the way we'd like to be living," and suggests that our "love affair with stuff is a surrogate conceited by our heads to obscure the real longings of our hearts."  Perhaps that seems harsh or that it doesn't apply to you, but now is the time to ask yourself "what would happen if we stopped to consider the possibilities inherent in the word 'enough'?

In this book Susanka addresses not only our accumulated stuff, but also how we use our time and energy. She proposes "life-remodeling," and not just house remodeling, because "the real problems are not the ones we can name and therefore do something about with relative ease, but the ones that are hidden from view…to make your life Not So Big means to be free from the driven, automatic behaviors that keep you asleep at the wheel, while propelling you willy-nilly through your daily routine." 

 I think of the Buddhist term, "Hungry Ghost," which is a metaphor for the part of us that is always unsatisfied and ask myself the question, What does the decluttering in my life free me for--not just from?

Reading the Susanka book reminds me that it is not enough to reduce the stuff in my life, but that I need at the same time to discover what is truly life-enhancing for this stage of my life. I am someone who thinks chronologically--first I get rid of x, y, z, and then when I have cleared the physical space, I can explore what is fulfilling now. Instead, this is a time of "both…and." 

A Paradox

How does one do that? Well, no surprise, Susanka recommends creating stillness in your life, meditating, and being intentional about deepening your acquaintance with your true self. The paradox is that living a life in line with your true self means setting aside the attachment we have to our "small self." The Not So Big life is actually one that is vast, limitless and without our own self-imposed boundaries and lowered expectations. 

How exciting is that! Bring on the dumpster and create more room for life! 

An Invitation
What a good New Year's book this is and one that can accompany you with its wisdom and guidance throughout the new year. I would love to hear what living "the not so big life" would mean for you --and how your own decluttering is proceeding in your own life.