Young Wisdom: Thursday's Reflection

Recent Texts Between Grandfather and Grandson, Age 12

Papa:           Checking in. How did
                    school go today?

Peter:           Good.

Papa:            What was good about it?

Peter:            By good, I mean nothing 
                     bad happened. My bar for 
                     good has lowered a lot.


Just as Peter's bar for good has lowered during this time of isolation and social distancing, I realize that my bar for productivity has lowered considerably. And I am telling myself that is ok during these unusual times.

What I can reasonably accomplish given my current energy level as our vigil time for my father continues is a mere shadow of what I used to consider my norm. I suspect, however, that my ability to move through an extensive To Do list every day would be substantially less right now, even without the focus on my father. 

I like to imagine that if my father weren't dying, I would use this shelter in place time to write, write, write. I would make great strides in my memoir and start and finish several essays for submission to a variety of publications. Maybe I would finally gather all my notes for a book of meditations for women in the third chapter of our lives. 

Maybe that would be the case, but I doubt it.

For right now I have lowered the bar:
             Make the bed.
             Shower and dress.
             Do some hometending every day. Yesterday I made chocolate chip cookies and then cleaned the kitchen.
             Respond to the most important email.
             Go on a walk.
             Spend some time in prayer and devotion.
             Read.


Most days I can manage these tasks beyond the time spent with my Dad, but not always. 

These are not normal times. We are in a time of adjustment. We have not lived this way before, and we are getting to know what is possible, what we need, and how we can best function. Some days are easier than others, but wasn't that the case when we were living at top speed?

I have noticed the last couple days that I don't need the Netflix distraction quite as much and that I am able to read again, after discarding many books that in another time most likely would have engaged me. Perhaps I am surrendering to this new rhythm.

Here's what I am discovering: writing a post twice a week provides me with a structure and gives me meaning and purpose beyond responding to our family situation, and setting aside time, NO MATTER WHAT, for prayer and devotion I feel calmer and more awake.  

I continue to create a weekly To Do list, but only include items I can be reasonably sure I can actually complete, but tucked at the bottom of the page is a list called "Bonus Tasks/Ideas," just waiting for me when I am able to stretch a little bit more. I look forward to that time, but until then I am trying to be gentle with myself and hope you are too.

Thanks, Peter, for the gift of your wisdom.

An Invitation
Have you lowered the bar for yourself? What does that mean? I would love to know.