Living in the Present: Thursday's Reflection

How often do you hear the advice to live in the present? 



Live now. 

Live now fully.

I have said those words, written those words myself frequently. I have examined the meaning of those words for myself, especially since I am a planner. What do I need to do tomorrow? The rest of this month? And how am I going to accomplish those things? 

What would it mean to be a recovering planner, I ask myself, as I add another item on my To Do list:  Conquer the need to plan.

Realistically, I know that isn't going to happen, but isn't there a way, I wonder, to be both a planner, to pay bills on time, to set goals for my writing, to make sure there is food in the house to eat, to be organized and ready for tasks I have agreed to do?

Perhaps planning and living the present moment are not the same thing. Perhaps thinking about what I need to do tomorrow or next week or even further in the future doesn't detract --at least not totally--from living in the present moment. I get confused about this some times. 

And then there is the fact that I am writing my spiritual memoir and that means looking backwards, pulling out the past, including what I would prefer to gloss over, sweep away. I have been keeping journals for decades. Packed in plastic bins from Target, aren't those journals mere bundles of past days meant to be set aside in favor of smelling the roses still left in the garden? 

As I said, I get confused about this business of living in the present moment sometimes. 

Recently, I heard a wise woman say, "Live as if you had eleven months to live. Not twelve months."

Today is Thursday, October 4th. If you only have eleven months to live, that means you will never know another October 4th, so how do you want to live your last October 4th? How do you want to live from now until September 4, 2019?

The Sufi mystic Rumi says, "There are a hundred way to kneel and kiss the ground." I take that to mean that there is more than one way to live fully, to live with a sense of the sacred in all we do and all we are. 

Once again I return to one of my mantras, "Sacred Yes. Sacred No."
Sometimes I have a hard time deciding whether something is a sacred yes or sacred no, but staying present to the distinction, subtle as it may be, is a way for me to explore my own path of awakening, as Kathleen Dowling Singh says in her book, The Grace in Living. 

Today I am present to the transition from early fall to the middle of fall. Today I am present to the sight of pumpkins lined up on the steps of more and more homes in my neighborhood. Today I am present to the open day in front of me when I will begin revising another chapter in my memoir. Today I am present to the taste of chili I made the day before. Today I am present to my quiet morning meditation time when I will listen for the voice of Spirit in whatever form it takes. Today I am present to the suffering in the world and offer blessings for all who live in pain, no matter the reason or the form. Today I am present to the time I will have with those who attend a guided labyrinth walk I am facilitating. Today I am present to encounters, face to face or via text or email.

Today I am present to the sacredness of this day. 

                             The blessings of heaven,
                             the blessings of earth,
                             the blessings of sea and of sky.
                             On those we love this day
                             and on every human family
                             the gifts of heaven,
                             the gifts of earth,
                             the gifts of sea and of sky.
                                           J. Phillip Newell

An Invitation
What does being present mean to you? I would love to know.