How do I begin? And once I begin, how do I come to an "Amen"?
The need for prayers is unending. Has it always been this way? Yes, of course, it has. The world and all its people have always needed the kind of holding, the kind of attention and awareness, the kind of connection and conversation that prayer creates.
But today, right now, is what I carry with me into prayer time--the time set aside for prayer and then the almost unconscious time for prayer that I wear like a sweater on these cool days.
At this very minute I hear a siren--first, quite faint, and then more distinct--and I whisper, "May all be well." My first intentional prayer of the day, but I know more will follow.
When I am not too overwhelmed by worries and concerns--big ones and little ones--I try to enter prayer with gratitude. Oh, yes the usual ones of gratitude for the health and the well-being of my family, for our home and church and community and the love of good friends, but I also try to note particular joys and delights, the unwrapped presents I've received.
An email from a church friend sharing the delights in her life.
A drive in our little car along the river--color in the bluffs, eagles in the sky, sailboats on the river, friends and conversation and pie in an outdoor setting.
Pumpkins. More pumpkins. Pumpkins on the patio. Pumpkins in "Paris."
Applesauce for dinner.
Reading time on the patio, wrapped in a shawl.
Completion finally of the draft for a new chapter.
A leisurely walk in the neighborhood. "Look, the witches are holding hands," I hear two little girls exclaim, and I think, "Why don't we all hold hands?"
A new flannel shirt.
A good annual physical with a doctor new to me, and I am relieved to really like her.
Roses still blooming in the garden.
And then I turn to what is on my heart. Who am I holding? What transformation is needed around and within me? Where is there hurt, fear, a lack of hope and what words, what actions can I offer?
I know some of what I pray is on your lips as well--prayers for our country and for the upcoming election, prayers for the homeless, for the food insecure, prayers for all those who are oppressed, who need justice.
A big list. A long list. An important list.
And then I turn to the specific on my heart: the friend undergoing chemotherapy for a serious cancer; our daughter-in-love's father awaiting a liver transplant, our granddaughter as she faces college applications, the two detained immigrants and the healthcare workers on the front lines who I write to weekly, friends who are grieving the loss of their only son, and many others.
A big list. A long list. An important list.
And then I return to the joys, the delights, the list of gratitudes that grows when I pay attention: this quiet time, the comfort of the Girlfriend Chair, the sound of Bruce fixing his breakfast and opening the door to get the paper, the fresh air coming through a barely open skylight, the journal almost completed, but another one awaits. And the openness of the day. Yes, tasks to do, but on my own time, my own schedule. More delights to discover.
Amen.
What brings you to prayer? What do you pray for? I would love to know.
Some Recommendations from Last Week
1. Gloria Dei Lutheran Church This is actually on ongoing recommendation. Our Sunday online worship services are amazing--the sermons, the music, the creativity, the personal connection, and you are invited. Perhaps you are unchurched and feeling a need to experience worship again. Perhaps you are committed to a faith community and will remain so, but your church doesn't have the ability to produce a well-done online worship time. Or perhaps as a reader of my blog who is Jewish said to me, "It is clear how important your church is to you, and I am just curious about it." Come.
2. Podcast: The Confessional with Nadia Bolz-Weber, specifically the September 22 episode with journalist Maria Hinojosa.
3. An article in The Atlantic on the definition of reparations. : https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/06/reparations-definition-2020-candidates/590863/.
Why does it seem my prayer list gets longer? I pray for myself (certain medical needs, attitude, etc) and all my family members, especially those with concerning medical problems right now. Same with my friends. And for the state of our world right now.
ReplyDeleteIn part I think our prayer list grows longer as we open our hearts--and become more aware of the needs and hurts around us. And I know that being at this stage of life--in my 70's--the losses and concerns are more frequent and often more serious. Keep praying--it matters.
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